Right.

Overview of the stupid 2009.

It is only a day left before 2010 starts. Thus, I feel obliged to recount the fatuousness and crappiness of year 2009. If I have the chance to turn back time, I would have taken it but as I have not been given that bounty from God, it seems utterly impossible.

Overall, I am not satisfied with this year. In fact, it is the worst year I have ever had. All the weird stuff happened to me. One by one. There were stupidity, selfishness, anger, guilt, lust, temptations, misunderstandings... The list goes on and on.

I feel tremendously sorry for myself. I did not make any self improvements. I chose the diverged path which led me to my own downfall. I have failed people I trust. The remorse within me has peaked to the highest point where I could not find forgiveness anymore.

It was like celebrating a birthday. You have fun and after a period of time, the excitement wears off because you know it ends. It is temporary. By the end of the day, you know it is just a date and that it leads you away from your youth. I had fun. But I know it was not a necessity. And I know I had to pay for what I have done.

That is all I could say about 2009. Had I not taken this road, I would not have to face the penitence, confusion and frustration. I would not learn from my misdeeds. Conclusively, I should be more than delighted that I have endured this year with patience and sincerity.

The only problem is, I do not feel that way.